| Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't. |
| Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.(Friend or Money!) |
| An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing. |
| Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference. |
| Cheer up, the worst is yet to come. |
| When your dreams turn to dust, it's time to vacuum. |
| I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you. |
| Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills . . . Making the last car payment. |
| No matter how hard you try, you can't teach physics to a dog. |
| If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? |
