How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
  ~ Both of them.

How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
  ~ He buys two cases of beer.
 
What is the difference between men and government bonds?
  ~ The bonds mature.
 
Why are blonde jokes so short?
  ~ So men can remember them.
 
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
  ~ No one knows, it's never happened.

Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
  ~ They all already have boyfriends.
 
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
  ~ A widow.
 
When does a woman care for a man's company?
  ~ When he owns it.

Why are married women heavier than single women?
  ~ Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
 
How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
  ~ Put the remote control between his toes.
 
What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
  ~ They're married.